well this will be short because i had something written then the internet crashed on me. Lame. I have a cold probably from non stop going for a week with minimum sleep. It seemed worth it at the time but dosent everything? And i talked about how my sister is afraid of diabetes and how even if she dosen't want it i do believe she has implied she would feel better about it if it was her not me that was diagnosed. I feel the same way, that im glad it was me and not her. I know im resilient enough, but then again she probably is too.
I know from reading that kids with diabetes often grow up quickly. I feel that i grew up quickly too even though i wasnt diagnosed until i was almost 18. it still changes almost all your ways of thinking. I know it makes me feel like the expensive child. Sometimes it feels that umless we win the lottery (HA) that will always have my medical bills looming over us and still have to worry about affording next weeks supplies and food. I still rather have all that hanging over my head then hers though. Maybe it's just an older sisters way of thinking. Maybe it's my own way of being selfish. Because i still dont want her to have to help me with shots or anything else. Though i have made her get food for me when im low. It still amazes me how much my mom helps.
I know if not for my mom i would have made it any where. It would be a lot more black and white to me without her. I dare to dream because of her. Love them both. going to go now BYE!!
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